18.9.07

Reneweded.

This is my 200th post here and I hope to make it purely forgettable. The thing I'm thinking about for these long absences is ideas.

I'm poor on ideas these days. I'm constantly amazed by people who think well laterally or think up, I get scraps of songs for a long time and eventually can wrestle all those lies under one ugly hat. You'd think I'd have refined this process by now.

A lot of you know that I actually hold a normal job, white collar, underpaid (but working on that and being rewarded quickly) and we train the shit out of people. There's an underlying belief in over-education making the best sales force in the world. I'm not in disagreement and I find a lot of life lessons in the training I host and attend, even though I don't really sell anything.

Today the topic was (indirectly) finding the niche you can best take care of and it struck me how poorly all renaissance people do. You can't be all things to all people and it may be the principle that so often gets us to the conclusion that the stupid are rewarded. It isn't the stupid, it's the singular. Sometimes they're kinda dumb, but often they just look that way. I keep saying this year that focus is what will separate the good from the great. A line through that extends into the singular being rewarded.

I hate it. I want to fuck around. I want to dabble, but I also want to be something better.

So, I'm renewing this deal I have with myself to write every day. Here, songs, notebooks, scraps laid out on the digitalis recordus in the car; whatever comes and whenever. I'm just happier when I make something. It's going to cause the website to become something different. I am what I am and that definition needs to be sharpened.

Expect more of me. Expect better of me.

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