Hope. That's the crap they're selling. You hope things will change. You hope things will never change. You hope you can make it. You hope there will be sun. You hope for rain.

And it's crazy, ya know? It's got love and hate and wishes and thoughts and beliefs all wrapped up in it. You hope you have a good summer. You hope the world will finally come to some peace and understanding through your made up language. You're invested so much of yourself in this unseen thing and your entire life you've been sold a bill of goods that says it's a good thing. Have hope. You gotta hope. Walk for hope to cure breast cancer. We live in hope and we die in despair.

I looked through all of these and could not find a disparaging comment in there save the one from my buddy Fred. Hope is the worst of evils, for it prolongs the torment of man

God bless you, Fred. I'll say it. Hope is a bastard and an disease. I'm not going to say we don't need it, we do, but it's like meat. We need the protein, but something's gotta die to get it.

The Greeks knew it. They said it, the last of the evils in the box was hope.


Hope was in a boxful of evil. That's why we're in this mess. We hoped money would make everything all right. We lied to get it. We lied our asses blue and then blamed the mortgage company for putting our lies on applications. Get over yourself. This "bailout" is our fault. Shut up about how we shouldn't have to bail out those greedy banks. Listen, it takes two to sin. We went with it and now we can't be honest enough to pony up. We hoped that we'd get a raise or somehow magic that mortgage into manageability.

So let me let you in on it, guys and gals:

Shut up. you danced. You took out your home's value while it was inflated and unreal. This bubble popped-like the last one and the one before that and the next one, too-against our bravest hope that easy money would never end and our values would go up 14% a year. We hoped. Now we pay the band. Shut up.

The universe is random. No one loves us out there. You don't have an inside line. Esperanto will not fix Babylon. We're gonna hope again and then we're all gonna bitch about the natural consequences.

Go ahead, hope she loves you. Hope for a godsend. Hope for good weather. It's either gonna be or it's not. "The Secret" is bull shit. Hope for a rich uncle. Hope to get laid.

Yeah, but hope in one hand and shit in the other and watch which one fills up first.

Oh, and:

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